little light

I haven't written in this thing since I started working. It's crazy how work drains you and makes you somewhat empty, like a shell of a person. It's important to fight against that. We have a tendency it seems to work our 40 hour a week job and during a time off we just want to eat, sleep, and watch tv. We need to fight against that with everything we have. I think God meant us to be so much more. He meant us to think, strive for more, pray, read, run, do things to make the lives of others better. I never used to understand why work made people so tired, but now I do. An 8 hour day really is forever and we tend to leave the best of ourselves there. But I still think it important to rise above that in as much as is possible. Try every day to (number one) spend some time with God, which will help with this next thing. Try every day to learn something knew, try hard to accomplish something or experience something new. Do something that will enrich you as a human being. Do something that will delve below the surface layer of humanity. Draw, write, read, walk; go find nature, go find yourself....GO FIND GOD! Sure he can be at work andyou will see more of him based upon your attitude and daily behavior toward others, but work is the place where you put into practice the things you learn about God when you aren't there. SO if you aren't learning about God and you aren't learning about yourself when you aren't at work there really just isn't anything for you to contribute to others when you are there.

At the end of each exhausting day, recharge your batteries by seeking God. Most of all, ask yourself what you took from God to give to others. Being a Christian is a give and take relationship, it is taking from God all that he is offering and spreading it as thickly as you can over as many people as you can. Learn to laugh and dance through life and teach others the steps.

I'm seeking a peace and a solitude that only comes through God. No earthly being: family, friend, or foe can help me with that. My great desire is to truly live and I want to laugh and I want to dance and I want to be silly about everything because life is an invaluable nonrenewable resource. With this being the case, I take one job seriously, and it is not the one I spend 8 hours a day five days a week at. It is the job of spreading God's light. I'm his little candle. So "this little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine."

an experience worth the trip

Faith is not about getting what i want. Faith is about not needing to. It's not needing to have what i want to be happy. It's about not needing my world to be full always of what's happy and bright to trust God. Faith is about trusting God when the path looks bleak and dark and goes on into a dark forest. Faith is knowing that come spiders, bears, snakes, rats, tarantaulas, or any other thing, that you will be taken care of. You will overcome because God overcame the world for you. It's big bad and ugly and it can knock you around but it cannot beat you. It's like a bully that rages on because he doesn't know that you will soon hit a growth spurt. I take that back. The world is full of the devil and the devil is a bully who doesn't know your big brother (your Holy Father).

"You don't have to see the whole staircase to take the next step when you have faith."
"Faith is knowing either that when you step into the darkness there will be something solid to stand on or that you will be taught how to fly."

Some days it's enough to say, I'm not graceful and my walk with you may not be pretty, Lord, but I'm still following you. I'm still hanging in there.

Your life with the Lord is a journey. He didn't promise you it would be easy and that there would be nothing to fear. He did, I think, promise adventure, excitement, things to see, places to go, and an experience worth the trip.

~Make your life a walk of faith and find an experience forever worth the trip.

eye spit

Yesterday I went running and got a bug in my eye. I thought, "well that sucks," especially since he stayed in there for twelve hours. Today I went running and my dad helped me gain perspective on it. He was like I guess that messed up his day; he drowned in eye spit. I started thinking about it. Say you are a nat just flying along and then all the sudden you end up in a giant pool of water, sweat, etc and you are getting smashed around by a giant stick (my finger). It may not have been the most fun for me, but I'm the one who is still alive. Today you may get a nat in your eye, but just remember to thank God for such a blessing. After all, today you aren't the nat.

footstool of blessings

One thing I believe: I should only fight the Good Fight. The Good Fight is the struggle to be the Christians we were created to be. All other fights are unncessary and pointless and expend valuable energy with which we might be doing something far more productive to further God's Kingdom. Fight the Good Fight; Finish the Race; Keep the Faith! You should get up every day and fight not with other people, fight not to succeed, fight not to make money. Fight to Keep the Faith. We all know Lot was in the business of keeping the faith-no matter what. He wasn't graceful about it, but he kept the faith. We can all do that much. Yeah, let the world take everything from you, and put up the fight to keep nothing but the faith and then it will all be made a footstool under your feet, as the blessings rain down on you.

I Yell at God!

I was talking to a friend of mine and he made me realize I like to yell at God. I really do. Sometimes, I am too angry at him to talk to him, or do what I call praying. So rather than giving God the silent treatment I just yell at him. I mean why not? So you might be thinking how dare you! The unfortunate events of your life are not God's fault because you probably choose poorly in life or lacked faith with which to move mountains as well as molehills. All of this is most certainly true. However, whether we admit it or not we all get frustrated deep down to our very souls and cores, and even feel empty inside. When I despair to that point and possess that much grief, I have to yell at God, especially since I know he has the power to transform my situation effortlessly if only he would. God wants us to love him enough to get angry with him just as we would our earthly fathers. After all, no one whom you do not love can truly make you angry. God knows what you are thinking and feeling anyways, so there are no extra strikes against you just for vocalizing the emotion. God knows what you are going through but he can't help you unless you ask him too, and he never said we can't ask in a loud and impatient voice. He just said ask and knock. By the way, he also didn't say we couldn't knock the door down. If the only way you can get through the door is with a sledge hammer, I vote you pound on through. You may think it perfectly fine to let off a little steam on your fellow man, yelling at him relentlessly, but more like taboo to yell at God. But consider this: A mortal man is more likely to be impacted by what you say, whereas God will be unharmed by it. Furthermore, God cares far more, is listening with unconditionally loving ears, and has the power to change your world for the better. The man you yell at doesn't care what is making you yell at him, isn't listening because he is thinking of the atrocious things he is about to yell back, and most likely has no power to change your world for the better. So I think it way more productive to yell at God.

I've been so downtrodden at times that I don't even know what to pray. That is to say I don't know what it is I want to transpire in my life. So i yell out to God. I don't know what to ask for! But here I am! I am still here, trusting you to do what is best for me. So do it already, even if it hurts! Just rip off the band aid already. The betwixt and between is killing me. Make me a tool. Make me your brand new Lot! Just make me yours! Mold my spirit to yours. Bend me till I break if you have to so that I will be your creation. I know it's the only way that I will be happy.

Don't wait to get on the happy drugs

I met this wonderful and very friendly girl the other day. She was intelligent, outgoing, and seemingly well adjusted. She was giving me some advice on how to survive my first year of law school since she had already jumped that hurdle. I do not wish to diminish her counsel, but what I remember most about our conversation is her telling me, "Don't wait to get on the happy drugs." She was of course referring to things like Paxil, Prozac, etc. At any rate, that sentence ran through my mind intermittently throughout the rest of the day. "Don't wait to get on the happy drugs."
Given the rigors of law school after only three weeks, this was starting to sound like a good idea. I don't think I'm going to wait to get on the happy drugs. Prozac and paxil aren't my happy drugs. My God in heaven and his son Jesus Christ, my savior, are my happy drugs. So when I'm feeling stressed and overwhelmed, all I have to do is take my happy drugs. I have a lifetime prescription. Are they expensive? Some may think so. They cost me my soul. Personally, I think it's an excellent trade off. I receive a lifetime supply of happiness in exchange for my battered, tarnished, ruined, broken and empty soul. Not only that, but like any great product, it comes with free gifts. It's way more than I paid for! I get eternal life, unconditional love, mercy, grace, peace, and an everpresent help in time of need. There is no better package deal on the market than that! You better hurry! This is a limited offer, expiring with your mortal body.

Lord, teach me to dance

Lord, teach me to dance when the only music in the world has to come from my own soul. Teach me to be a joyful noise when no other can be found. Teach me to have a melody and a song in my heart even before I can find the lyrics to the soundtrack of my life. Teach me to hum along gleefully even when the words are slow to come.

Teach me above all that no matter my struggle or my circumstance that negativity never creates a song. Therefore, it should never become the tune of our lives because we were meant to dance.

"You came that we may have life and have it more abundantly."

When I can do no other, I am "standing on the promises of God."

Today Stands Alone

Lord, teach me to let each day stand alone. Let me have a spirit that is free, allowing you to "nourish and renew" me day by day. Teach me to evaluate my days in terms of 24 hrs only. It's either this day was good or this day I could have done more with. I could have chosen to be happier, I could have been friendlier, kinder, and gentler. I could have reflected you more. However, the important thing to remember is that you always forgive us for "the ways in which we fall short of your glory" and all we must to do please you is to live the subsequent days as a brand new start, another opportunity to bring something good into this world, a little piece of you as it is worked through us. But whatever happens in my days, Lord, do not allow me to think this day was only okay because it was better than yesterday or not as bad as tomorrow will probably be.

I know my purpose here is to "love you with all my heart, soul, and mind and to love my neighbor as my self." I confess that I do not know your specific purpose for my life, but I think it is important not to search so longingly for it that we fail to enjoy what is good beneath the heavens, always reflecting your light in our lives and showing heaven to our fellow man in as much as we understand it.

As Christians, we were not meant for lives characterized by worry or regret. We are here to make our Father proud, and that task is so easy. Only with God is your effort more important than the results so get up every day and fight. Fight to be the best version of yourself you can be. Make it your goal each night to rest your head on your pillow and say, "Today I did the best I could with what I had to work with. Tomorrow I might be better or I might be worse but nothing will diminish today...for it was good. It stands alone, except for what part God allowed me to play in it.

God allows you to contribute to his projects anyway in which you choose. You can bring your paralyzing worry and regret, which makes you believe you have nothing good to offer your Father in his work, or you bring your love and your joy and "cover over a multitude of sins." What you have to offer today is not based on your yesterday or your tomorrow. Let today stand alone. You will be amazed with what God can do with a single day that you do not pollute with negativity.

Most of all, do not afraid to enjoy today for fear of what tomorrow will bring. Tomorrow will not get worse because you enjoyed today, but you might find that your spirit has more strength with which to fight.

road of life under construction

the road of my life is totally under construction. i was on my way to graduate this morning and the road leading me there was being worked on. the going was slow and there was nothing but a mess everywhere i looked. its as though following graduation nothing in my life will be certain. i'm struggling right now. i'm trying to hard to feel led by God right now but i just don't know what he wants for my life. i'm not totally in the dark. i know i was created to serve him and to love others with all that i am. i guess i just don't know what i'm meant to do in a more specific sense. Lord, teach me to find peace, solace, and stability when i can't see your path for my life laid out before me. teach me to be patient and have faith strong enough to know that you will provide me with a way to stand up under any burden that i face, that you will light my path in order to see what you want me to, and that it's impossible for me to get off track far enough to do damage you can't repair. Lord, "teach me to walk by faith when i cannot see [and] to stay right here in the light" (Jeremy Camp, Stay) Truth: the road of my life is taking me slowly along and its seems to be nothing more than a mess. Greater truth: God is getting me right where I need to be a little everyday. God can navigate the broken road. there's grace along the way; God's grace is always sufficient.

don't beat dirt; swim upstream

I was standing outside trying to beat the dirt out of my car mats. I was hitting the things as hard as I could against a tree. I did it time and again, but no matter how many times I did it dirt continued to fall onto the leaves below. This is my life. I cannot clean it up on my own. I will try time and again to be good enough out of my own will and volition. I will always fail. Just like these mats, the dirt in my life doesn't show. However, God and I both know its there. The only way I know how to live well enough to be deserving of the purpose for which God has called me is to life a life in which I let the Holy Spirit dominate me. Do not mistake me, I am not talking about salvation. We will never earn our salvation or be good enough to deserve it. That is a gift for which there is not enough thanks and one in which we cannot pay back its value. Still, God's will shall direct my life. The only way to be clean is to allow God to bathe you in his blood. In most cases, the easiest way to know if it's your way or God's way is generally by how difficult it is and what you feel like after the mission is completed. If you do it your way, it will be easy and make you happy at the time, but many times you will feel unsatisfied, empty, or even guilty afterwards. But, if you do it God's way, you feel like you are swimming upstream. Why? Because you are! God's way has nothing to do with the ways of the world. The Bible reminds us time and again that we are aliens here. This is not your home. It is no wonder that you feel different than other people and why sometimes you have a longing you cannot explain. You are homesick. When you are struggling and feeling alone, remember that God is always with you and has promised to never leave you. You can fail him, we will all fail him, but he always forgives us, and takes us up lovingly into his arms and cares for us whenever we call out to him. All the hairs of our heads are numbered. This detail from the Bible lets you know the depth of God's love for you and that he cares about every single minute detail of your life. The Bible also tells us that he cares for the birds of the air, providing for all of their needs and that we are worth infinitely more than this to him. Thus, the hymn His Eye Is on The Sparrow.
My favorite book of the Bible has always been Psalms. Whenever I distance myself from God for whatever reason...stress, work, apathy, etc. Psalms is where I always seem to rediscover him. Psalms is simply people calling out to God, who are filled with pain, anguish, revenge, anger. I can identify with this. They plead with God to destroy their enemies and come to their aid. They are screaming, Lord, Lord, help me, save me. They don't clean up their emotions, and they don't attempt to hide anything from God. They come to him in their raw humanity. That is all God wants from us. You can talk to him when you are angry, depressed or scared. He doesn't hold any of this against you. Give God your dirty mat filled with dirt (your heart). He will beat it all out, and restore everything to perfect working order in your life. Life is a fight and a struggle. There is no denying this. We are souls not from here controlled by a body that is. This a total paradox, so living gets tough from time to time. Laugh Scream, Shout, or Cry out God's name in all your wretched emotion, but never cease to call out to him. God knows your heart anyways. He's knows if it is black with dirty thoughts and emotions, but he can't help you with that if you don't ask. Stop banging your heart against the tree. Remeber this: man cares about what you appear to be, how things look on the outside. God does not care what it looks like, but what it is. Don't wait until you can put your best foot forward to talk to God. Come to him dirty and broken and let him teach you how to put your best foot forward. Be like the little girl whose grandfather discovered her reverently reciting the alphabet. When asked what she was doing, she said I don't know what to pray tonight so I'm just saying all the letters. God knows what order they go in.

god spoke to me

All day I've been railing against what God wants me to do. This is typical of me. Today, however, I have been particularly consistent in my complaints. As a result, God spoke to me. Although, audibly, he used another's voice. It all happened quite unexpectedly but I know it was said for me. If said a second sooner or later I never would have heard it. If said any other day I would have never applied it to my life. In God's glory, he gave it to me at just the right time in the right situation. Despite the simplicity of this one phrase, it was said with such passionate emotion which I can only characterize as despair. "I don't have the education to get an easier job."

take me sailing, father

I have an analogy. I was cleaning my father's sailboat so we could go sailing like I wanted to do. I get my soap and I scrub and scrub with all different kinds of brushes and sponges. At the onset, my father had told me just what to use. I worked for a couple hours on the boat using everything except what he assured me would work best. Later, my father comes to check my progress and I say I just can't get it right. This is the best I can do. He just kinda laughs and picks up the scrubby pad he had recommended I use to start with and simply rubs away spots that I had scrubbed at repeatedly with no success. In the analogy, my father is God and the sailboat is my life. The scrubby pad, of course, is the Bible which is the way he has told me how to do it. The situation is the same; I still do things every which a way except for the way in which God has assured me is the tried and true method to get to the things I want, like going sailing. In other words, your Heavenly Father wants what is best for you. He wants to take you sailing right through life, and he knows how best to get there. He is content to let you have your independence and do it your own way, but you can save yourself a lot of work and do a better job if you will just follow his guidelines.

doors and windows

The hardest thing for me to learn is doors and windows. In God's good pleasure he shuts some and opens others. My deal is that I am all the time trying to pry the closed doors back open. What happens then is that I get them slammed in my face. The pattern goes something like this. God gently shuts a door and gestures toward a more appropriate direction. I then say but God I really like what's behind that door. So I open it again. God puts a padlock on it, but I won't stay away from it. Eventually God puts a wall up around the door all together. Guess what I do? I certainly don't do the easy thing. I refuse to just walk around the wall. I either try to dig a route beneath it or I try to scale the thing, but if all else fails I just stand there and bang my head up against the damned thing. Only when the pain outweighs my desire for the thing I am trying so desperately to keep (which God has known all along wasn't in my best interest) do I relinquish it in favor of God's original and perfect plan for my life. All I do is waste time and energy and get hurt when I try to be the pilot of my own life. Life is so much less complex than we realize. If you have prayed diligently about something and it is still going the same way, regardless of the fact that its the opposite of what you wanted, things are still going just as God intended them. It's better a little pain now than a lot later. Contrary to popular belief, if you are seeking God's will for your life, the easy way out is the right way out. "Sometimes walking away from something isn't only the easiest thing to do; it's the right thing to do." As a Chinese kid in my class said of Jackie Chan doing his own stunts "Nobody knows how many hurts there are on his body." Do yourself a favor: stop trying to do stunts that will get you through that door. In other words, if you are not getting a signal, this is not the time to go chase down an antenna.

i'm losing the battle but god has won the war

The saddest thing in the world is one of God's warriors going into battle and getting totally beaten and bloodied because they went into battle unprepared--they didn't take their weapons--the sword and the shield (Jesus Christ)! I've seen it too many times, with myself included. It seems sometimes that we are repeatedly getting knocked down by life. At times like this it seems that all the bad and negative feelings feed on themselves. All your thoughts become negative. This is when you know you have lost the joy, peace, and love that God meant for his children to have. There is no getting back to the good on your own. At every turn and with every good thing you attempt to do and every good frame of mine you will try to get yourself into will only be met by more obstacles and hurdles. Nothing will work, except turning back to God. There is no answer except prayer. You have to ask God to reclaim your heart and give you the joy back. We are slaves to anything which has mastered us. The only way you can be happy in slavery is if God is your master. If God is your master, your only burden is being faithful to Him and doing your best to serve him. Serving him will only enrich your life and give you peace and joy. God doesn't expect us to live perfect lives. In fact, he knows we can't do all he asks of us, and we should not beat ourselves up for falling short of God's glory. The only thing that matters to God is that we keep fighting to be the people he wants us to be. We have to continually choose to turn from darkness to light. After all, our fight is not against flesh and blood but against the spirits of darkness. More than flawless lives of righteousness,God wants that we live lives characterized by love. Love needs to be the dominant characteristic of our lives. We were meant to be salt and light to all around us, so that they can thirst for Christ and see his glory reflected through us. It doesn't matter what our jobs are or what or what level of success we reach by this world's standards. All that matters is that we love God and that we love those we come into contact with as brothers and sisters in Christ and constantly strive to act in love toward everyone. It is so beneficial to put your focus on God and others. When you do this, you take the focus off your life and what is wrong with it. All you think about is how you can be of service and since there are so many ways you can help others you will always find yourselves fulfilled rather than lacking. Remember that even though your are losing the battles, all you have to do is make sure you remain forever a member of God's army. He has won the war! In order, to attain the spoils, you must be on the victor's side. The individual battles are of no consequence, just remember which side you are on. Also, remember that if you find yourself in a negative frame of mind, it's because your side is losing the battles, and the only reason you are losing is because you have gone into battle without your weapon, Jesus Christ first and foremost, then prayer, then the Bible. Run to your stronghold and get nourished and renewed. Then get back into battle. You're sure to win this one!

camper

I am a seasoned camper. Look at my talents: drove out to the campground for a weekend beach trip with my buddy Jen. Stepped out of the car and instantaneously begun getting bitten by bugs, woke up the next morning and peed next to a snake, got burnt on the beach wearing spf 30, got lost on the beach taking a walk and was gone two hours, injured my foot running to look for my friends, thought my flashlight strap was a bug, walked in two a spider web that I couldn't get off me, got bitten by ants every time I sat down. I went outside to rediscover nature and discovered that the men who made ac, box fans, bug spray, indoor plumbing, toilet paper, etc are too best!! I still think there was something novel about sleeping three nights outside and for some strange reason i think i could be talked into going again.

Heaven Knows

Oleander Lyrics:

Only heaven knows
Only heaven shows the way
Back to everything you know and love
Only heaven knows
Only heaven shows the way
Back to everything you know and love
Everything you know and love
Everything you know and love
Back to everything you know
All of this time
It's been benign

shimmer

What have I learned today? Sometimes its both too late and too early to do everything you want to do. The worst thing in the world is not being tired, not having anything to do, nor anywhere to go and not being able to make any noise about it. It's too early to sleep, it's too late to run, too late to play with any of my friends and too late to make any noise.

Random Song Lyrics:

Time I cannot change so here's to looking back
you know I drink a whole bottle of my pride
and I toast to change
to keep these demons off my back
just keep these demons off my back
cause I want to shimmer, I want to shine
I want to radiate
I want to live, I want to love
I want to try to learn now not to hate
try not to hate
we're born to shimmer
we're born to shine
we're born to live, we're born to love
we're born to never hate

hard rule

Salvation=simplicity. Living the life of a Christian=impossibility without the grace of God. To stay close to Him and to remain in his will for your life means to be convicted of everything, whether it is listed in the ten commandments or not. The Bible says that all things not motivated by faith are sin. That's a hard rule.
However, I thank God for the problems that I have as well as the ones I do not have. I have problems like Lord, make me strong enough to live the life you have planned for me. Help to me to be faithful enough to trust you. Help me to know that there is no place I will tread and no decision I will make where you will not be there for me, and even more so, if it is the decision motivated by you. Forgive for me being disobedient due to my lack of my faith and my own human desires. Teach me that anything which makes me worldly and causes me to focus on you less than I ought to is wrong for me.
I thank you Lord that all I struggle with is my convictions versus my desires and that I do not have a problem with drugs or alchohol, that I am doing well in school, that I do not suffer from depression, that I have had a loving and stable family life. That I have been provided with all creature comforts. I thank you Lord that I as far back as I can remember you have always been a part of my life.

running looks good

Today a woman taught me that sometimes running looks good and that I should always dance, regardless of what other people think. She also taught me to make sure that I never stay with anyone because they really love me when I don't feel the same about them, but this works both ways. Don't stay with anyone that you are crazy about if you know they don't feel the same about you. I also learned that the one who makes the best date, doesn't always make the best husband. A good husband is loyal, dependable, hard working, trustworthy. He's a rock or he's a puppy. He may not be smooth or romantic but he will take care of you and love you.

art exhibition

I don't always know where I'm supposed to be, but it always seems as though God has me exactly where he wants me. It's as though he uses those around us to tell us the things he wants us to know. Tonight, he used a German classmate of mine to tell me that I have depth and its okay to be close to my parents, yet break away for self-absorbed reasons of my own. It's okay to enjoy final days even though they don't last. He used a political science, model/actor classmate of mine to show me that it's okay to love and to hurt and to leave your heart out there to do it all over again. He used a couple of really good friends to show me he's thinking about me, that he cares, and that I'm not alone. God uses the people who come into our lives as instruments to help us. Sometimes, it's that listening ear at just the right time, sometimes it's a well placed hug, and sometimes it's a phone call, saying, "hey, come play with us." that seem to make sense when nothing else does. It's crazy how a random jaunt through a golf course in the middle of the night, when that night and a few subsequent days belong to you, can lead to a chapel where the doors aren't locked. A cross on the ceiling can show you that everything is just as it should be. It's not that the circumstances of your life are any more clear or that you have figured out the direction you should take. It's that you have peace and can run around confidently in circles like a chicken with your head cut off laughing hysterically because you aren't the one driving anyways. I guess I'm saying Jesus took the wheel, and I ended up in my father's house singing praises to his name, knowing that in that moment there was no place else I should be. Funny how God began this night with an art exhibition and showed me beauty all night long.

Woodpecker

God created a bird that can put holes in trees with its face. It seems to me he has the power to do anythinng and everything, however big, however small. He does all things in his good pleasure. Why not let him have his way with your life? After all, if he expects you to bore through wood, he will equip you with the proper tools with which to do so.

fun with mr pibb

Not having Latin American politics today, I slept in. I thought this would be a great morning for this reason. Nope! I jumped in the shower and had to leave before I was ready to give a classmate her book back. Then I was burning up hot all morning. I rounded up enough change to get a diet coke. I pushed the button for diet coke and a mr. pibb fell out. I think to myself that sucks. I dropped in on the floor and it exploded. Then I thought well, some days are just better than others. I was just real freaking happy not to be wearing any mr. pibb. I came home for lunch and ended up wearing some of my soup. At this point, I just started laughing. Even when things are bad, its all really funny. I like to think of God having a sense of humor. I say it sucks about the mr. pibb then God is like oh really? Check this out. Explosion! No more mr. pibb problem. Now that is humor!!!

More than Conquerors

We are more than conquerors. Christ the Lord overcame the world before time began (it just doesn't know it yet). Satan knows this truth, but why would he admit it? The God of peace will soon bring Satan under your feet. If you aren't already on God's team, you might want to switch sides before the victor collects the spoils of war, and the insurgents are put on trial to receive their just punishment. There are no neutrals; all parties are brought into this war of the spirits. Take up defenses with the Lord or forfeit your soul to the loser. The battle goes not to the world's strong, but to God's weak for He gives them strength when they need it.

Strength To Stand

His strength is perfected in our weakness. I went to a retreat once called the Strength to Stand Conference. They gave us a small white flag, representing surrender. Jesus, is your strength to stand. If you want to be strong, be strong enough to let go and let God. When you pray, give it all up. Release the pain, suffering, sorrow, worry, fear, etc. Once you've prayed about it, let God carry your burdens. They will do nothing but tear you down. To give them to God is to edify Him and yourself. His grace will be sufficient for you and you will not be tempted beyond what you can bear. God will always provide you a way out so that you may be able to stand up under it.

"Walking in the Lord"

I'm gonna do my walking in the Lord
I'm gonna do my singing in the Lord
I'm gonna do my dancing in the Lord
I'm gonna do my running in the Lord

Chorus:
walking in the Lord
singing in the Lord
dancing in the Lord
running in the Lord

I'll walk by faith when I cannot see
I'll sing praises to his name
I'll dance for his pleasure
I'll run to his stronghold

I'm gonnna do my falling in the Lord
I'm gonna do my standing in the Lord
I'm gonna do my waiting in the Lord
I'm gonna do my willing in the Lord

Chorus:
falling in the Lord
standing in the Lord
waiting in the Lord
willing in the Lord

I'll fall to my knees when I am weak
and there I'll find strength to stand.
I'll find his time to be the right time.
I'll make his will my own

I'll do these things...

Chorus:
Cause walking in the Lord
Gives me peace
Gives me joy
It gives me strength to stand.
(Repeat)

Borrowing a Sunset

Driving home this evening, I saw a beautiful sunset. I began thinking how things in our lives are like sunsets. Just because something is beautiful doesn't mean that you can keep it or that it will stay. You can see and enjoy these things but you can't capture them. Its just the way you can't capture the true essence of a sunset with a camera. Still, the sunset's value is not diminished. We only become dissatisfied when we attempt to hold onto the beauty in this life that was never meant to stay. Never plan to keep the beauty. Just borrow it for awhile.

I'm God's Puppy

I saw a girl walking her pretty golden lab puppy earlier today. The puppy was excited and wanted to stop and look at everything and experience it all. A little tug on his leash and he was off and running again following behind his master. It seems that we are like this with God. We often get distracted by things along our path that delay us or take us off course. Then, God gives us a little tug to get us refocused on the things that are important. There will be many things you will want to devote your time to that are neither productive nor constructive. Endeavor to keep following behind your master and do not let your excitement of the things of this world delay you or cause you to run ahead of your master who is in heaven. Follow behind him dilligently. Trust that he will let you stop and "sniff" the things that are better than anything you could find on your own. When you experience God's tug on your leash, even if it is a little painful at times, just realize that he is going come on, I've got better things to show you.

Seasons

Ecclesiates 3:1-8 tells us that there is a time for everything and a season for every activity under heaven:... There is a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gether them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away...
This means that there is a season for our relationships. No person will be in your life throughout its entirety. You will lose your grandparents probably before you leave college, and you will lose your parents before you become a grandparent. Your friends and boyfriends will come and go. The point is to recognize that those who are a part of your life were only intended to be there for a season. Be not suprised nor dicouraged when that season ends. Rejoice in the experience and in what you learned about life and yourself. Think of how the season has enriched your life and recall fondly the portion of your journey you took with the other person.
Never let fear of the season's end deny you of the season. Know that the season will end and accept it. Enjoy all the seasons that God has blessed you with. After all, a life filled with happy seasons is a happy life. We don't rail against the changing of winter into spring and neither should we fight the changing of life's seasons. Instead, we should await the coming season with hope and excitement rather than fear and anxiety. God is faithful throughout all our seasons and is the only one we can have a relatonship with that never comes to an end.

Patience

Patience is a virtue. It requires us to give up the one thing that we seem to have the least of and desire the most of and the thing we have no way of getting back once it has been lost: time. I find that I struggle to have patience. I know that my time on earth is but a breath, so I desire to use my time here as well as I can. Therefore, when I am waiting on other people or even God, I, at times, feel like I am wasting my non-renewable resource of time. What I need to remind myself when I feel the sand slipping through the hour glass is that for me and all Christians time is endless. If I truly have faith that upon leaving this world I go to one eternal then there is no such thing as time. I also need to remember that when I feel I am wasting "my" time that it doesn't belong to me at all. Once you acknowledge Jesus as your savior, your time is his time. What we all fail to recognize as Christians is that our time on this earth only has value in as much as it reflects Jesus Christ
To truly show Christ's love to others, put in the time. Do something that someone else wants you to do, something to benefit them or enrich their life in some way in lieu of what your natural tendency inclines you toward. However, do it without saying, "well, I am doing this for you but really I want to be....." No, you must do it whole heartedly and not begrudingly or resentfully. Not easy is it? This is why it's a virtue. You can do this on your own. This has to be done with the power of the Holy Spirit (God's presence in your life).

Desires of My Heart

God gives you the desires of your heart. Does this mean he gives you the things that your heart desires or he creates the desires in your heart? My heart is in one city and my body in another. If God has given me this desire I should be there, right?
I don't have the answers to these questions. I feel I could lose everything and live in a shack, being content, happy, and blessed so long as I didn't forget who my Lord is or who by consequence that makes me. I believe I could make it alone without being bitter or unhappy. God is in the business of healing broken hearts. He's healed one before I'm sure of. The only heart he can't heal is the one broken by denial of him.
I can't shake the belief that I would be happier without all of the things of this world with God as my captain than have all of them with myself as my captain. After all, alone I am never lonely. How could I be when I read the truth and talk to the One who wrote it?
Lord, there is your way and the highway and I've been out on that lonely road too long to want to keep traveling it. Show me the way home-the one that leads to life. I want to be yours more than I want to be any other thing. So whatever else is going on, that is the primary desire of my heart.

God Owns the Details Too

It seems as though people don't come to God because by and large Christians don't seem any happier than anyone else. They figure they will have to follow a lot of rules and will gain nothing. After all, life for Christians appears as hard and bad and miserable as what they are living. Christians trust God with their souls and have full confidence about where they will spend eternity. However, they often fail to trust God in the every day details of their lives and they fail to find the strength to steal their lives out of Satan's clutches. I hope to not fear to live my happiness out loud. I want the world to know that I am saved and blessed beyond belief, all the while deserving none of it. When things are good, we often wait for the other shoe to drop, almost holding our breath, afraid to be too happy for fear that happiness is a fleeting thing. However, life is so short that it does not matter whether or not the happiness lasts. In the end, all that will matter is that you drank it all in, just as it was given to you, and that you loved and you laughed and you played and you feared not the coming hours, knowing that this hour is all that you are guaranteed. To live this moment well is to have accomplished more than the all the most learned figures of history combined have ever done.